Saturday, February 7, 2009

Psycho Circus

Little Tommy Sanders was afraid of clowns,
The ghoulish face,
The mountainous shoes,
The morbid, gruesome grin,
Clowns made Tommy cry,
and shake from within.

One day daddy said,
"I don't care if this is what you dread,
this fear you must shred,
Little Tommy cried out, "Please don't make me go,
Don't make me see my dreaded foe,
I'll do anything you ask mow, grow, and even snow."

Tommy drank some Pepsi to steady his nerves,
To prepare him for what he was gonna observe,
For the trapeze,
He was light as a breeze,
For the lions,
Tommy started to lighten,
But then came the merry andrew*,
With his laughs and fun and games,
Made little Tommy cry in fits of shame.

Then little Tommy went to the john,
And when he was done his parents were GONE!!!
He searched and searched and searched the tents,
Until he was finally spent.

Some clowns came over to Little Tommy,
And said, "We can help you find your mommy"
So he relcutantly followed the comics,
Into a tent smelling of gin and tonic.

Little Tommy ran and hid,
But the clowns they found him, they did,
They tied him up in a little brown chair,
And they chanted," You haven't a prayer,
Your folks are gone,
You will join our lair and wear what we wear,
Little Tommy cried,
"I will never join your clan,
If I must die I will die like a man!"

First the clowns took off their paint,
This almost made Tommy faint,
These clowns were not monsters, or ghouls,
But just men with evil in their hearts,
And souls that were cruel,
The men took out their weapons of torture,
They were surprisingly feathers,
Tommy they started to tickle,
He started to laugh and giggle,
He continued to giggle and giggle and giggle,
Until the torture became hurtful,
Little Tommy screamed and screamed and screamed,
Until he finally conceded,
"I will join your lair,
and wear what you wear."

Year after year passed after that fateful day,
Tom became the most famous of the clowns,
and the most gay*,
Before every show,
Tom would drink Jack Daniels
to steady his nerves, his mind, his soul,
whatever he did,
the crowd would laugh and laugh and laugh
and laugh some more.

Days, months, years passed
Wars, famines, fads didn't matter,
Just the show,
and the performance,
It didn't matter though,
even on a poor day,
the crowd would laugh and laugh and laugh
and laugh some more.

After another kidnap,
Tom felt so bad,
He knew he was gonna do it,
He took his Colt,
Out on stage,
And pulled the trigger,
the crowd laughed and laughed and laughed
and laughed some more.

*merry andrew is another name for clown.
*I mean gay like happy not homosexual.

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